If you, LORD, kept a record of sins,
Lord, who could stand?
But with you there is forgiveness,
so that we can, with reverence, serve you.

I wait for the LORD, my whole being waits,
and in his word I put my hope.
I wait for the Lord
more than watchmen wait for the morning,
more than watchmen wait for the morning.

Israel, put your hope in the LORD,
for with the LORD is unfailing love
and with him is full redemption.
He himself will redeem Israel
from all their sins.

So now, I’m sitting contentedly in the computer lab, cup of blessed coffee in my hand, and blogging to the world about my experiences because sometimes life as a grad student is too amusing not to share with people

Try to define it, seek in vain its source

or where it vanishes. By formulas

and theories tell me what it is I breathe,

what makes the stars bright, why the waves are long

unending servants of a master-moon.

Tell me why I love, why I see blue

in a sky where no blue is, but only light.

Tell me my pen is nothing but a force

my hand (which is not either) works upon,

and that the keys my fingers linger on

are never ivory, but are molecules

“gyrating in a predetermined form.”

Tell me the scent of lilacs is not real

but only a fusion working on my sense.

Tell me the fresh green of a new spring lawn

is chlorophyll. Tell me turgidity

makes hyacinths stand stiff beside the path.

Tell me all this. I shall believe you true

and grant you what you say. But music – there

try to define it! Seek in vain its source,

its essence, where it waits for my two hands

to call it forth from yellowed, singing keys.

Put it in tubes, solve its complexities,

tell what its structure is – yes, if God will.

But you can hound it down the path of years

and curse and stamp. It shall elude you still.

- Jane Tyson Clement

I definitely see their point about being a gospel-centered place of worship and understand their warning about cutting-edge performance becoming an idol.  I think that’s a message that EVERYONE should hear because it’s easy to what you do to become who you are.

However, I really disagreed with some of their definitions and conclusions.  It seemed to me that the discussion created a false choice between creativity and the centrality of the gospel.  I think they needed to define their terms more clearly b/c most of the time when they were using the term “creativity” what I think they meant was “sensationalism,” –doing something for the wow factor that is often exhibited in a product that is slick and surface level.  In short, a self-centered performance.  But creativity is just the opposite.  I really heard this when the one pastor said, “We don’t want to be a church that’s known for it’s creativity.” To me, that smacked of a very narrow understanding of the nature of creativity.

It’s refreshing to understand that it isn’t our responsibility to woo people into the kingdom by our art.  I completely agree.  That’s in the job description of the Holy Spirit, but I don’t think that’s any reason to devalue the place of art and beauty–even those that don’t necessarily use overtly biblical themes or text.  In fact, excellent art is anything BUT sensational and seeker friendly.  It requires humility, patience and receptiveness to understand, think about and appreciate.  Like finer points of science or nature, it can also illuminate the truths of the gospel in ways that sometimes cannot be experienced just through words.  I strongly believe that the more we pour ourselves into doing beautifully honest, excellent work the more opportunities we give ourselves and others for experiencing God on a deeper level.  This is especially true of Christians.   Creativity flows from a person’s worldview and toward their endgame.  If our worldview is biblical and our endgame is Christ and his kingdom how cannot it not serve to glorify him?

Sensationalism and self-centered performance seeks to glorify ME, but true and biblical creativity exists to give.  One of the primary ways to worship God is to be creative.  Being creative simply means to use the resources God has given you to make or restore, in other words, redeem.  Creativity and worship go hand in hand.  We should be churches known for  creativity because we should be churches who are full of renewed people who are energetically redeeming the environment around us because we are drawing inspiration for our creativity from the gospel.

Aunt Christine: “Turk!  Shhh!”

Dad: “hehehehe”

Uncle Turk: “Well Buck started it!”

But since I am done with the semester and need something to do that makes me feel somewhat productive before I move on to the next thing I have decided to respond to the public outcry against my silence.  I tell you what, those two posts inquiring after an update were quite motivating.

Newsworthy happenings from the past year follow in no particular order:

- Finishing an entire year of graduate studies.  wOOt!

- Becoming a better musician.

- Learning.

- Figuring my way around the labyrinth that is the music building.

- Braving -30 degree temperatures.

-Having both a Meijer and a Walmart within 5 minutes of my apartment (This might not seem that special but it’s quite the luxury after spending four years in rural Indiana where the nearest Walmart was 20 minutes away in the next town over.)

- Friends.

- Learning to speak a little Indonesian and Chinese.

- Visiting Canada for the first time. 

- Finding a church and a Bible study.

- Looking up and recording all the collegiate flute teachers in the United States (this was not necessarily the most enjoyable experience but this was an epic task basically on par with running a marathon or something and thus was included in the list).

- Teaching a college methods class.  This slowly become less terrifying and more fun over time.

- Learning how to eat Chinese hot pot.

- Hanging out with my Taylor girls in Indy.

- Visits from MWF people!

- Realizing yet again that I am horrible at time management and am probably allergic to day-planners.

- Pulling my very first academic all-nighter as a result of horrible time management and lack of day-planner skillz.

It’s too bad these have been boiled down into outline form because they each deserve an entry to themselves.  But this format is just so darn convenient and user friendly!  This year has been a crazy and at times confusing blur (probably due in part to my inability to consistently use my planner) but of the many things I was able to take away from this year, the innumerable expressions of God’s faithfulness and grace top the list.  Fo’ shizzle.  Ask me about it sometime.  I might even elaborate on it beyond outline form

The Way I See It # 76

“The irony of commitment is that it’s deeply liberating–in work, in play, in love.  The act frees you from the tyranny of your internal critic, from the fear that likes to dress itself up and parade around as rational hesitations.  To commit is to remove your head as the barrier to your life.” – Anne Morriss Starbucks customer from New York City.